Sunday, October 21, 2012

OK. I’m back. I need this.

It has been a long time.  Too long.  There are many reasons why I stopped writing and I could probably explain in detail but probably no one really cares.  Basically, I freaked out.  I felt like everything in my life was “too real” and yet I wasn’t able to really face it in the way I had originally intended on this blog…so I quit.  But, for some reason, I have been thinking a lot about what I would write if I were still blogging.  Then suddenly today a friend of mine commented on an old post of mine and there the blog was…and I had to face the fact that it showed up for a reason.

I think there is probably too much to catch up on.  I can’t decide if I should do some sort of major update or just start from now.  I guess a little of both.  Because I will have to explain how we got here if I am going to write about where I am, right?  So here we go…

Truman is now 3 1/2 years old and is truly an angel on earth.  There is something about him that draws people in and makes them want to be around him.  It is amazing to watch complete strangers come across the room to talk to him or ask for a hug.  He has this ability to pick out the one person in the room that is upset, uncomfortable or just in need of a dose of happiness and he beelines directly to them.  Sometimes it is a simple pat on the leg and a smile.  Other times he will literally crawl up into the person’s lap and give them a hug.  And every time, seriously every time, the person starts to smile and tells me in some format that, “I really needed that” or “he just made my day.” 

And it happens mostly in complete silence.  It happens in silence because Truman doesn’t speak.  That is wrong.  Truman speaks clearly but not with words.  He communicates through touch, sounds, smiles, a handful of signs and a few specific words.  My favorite word is “Yeah!” 

“Do you want an M & M, Tru?”  “Yeah!”

“Did you have fun at school today?” “Yeaaaahhhh!”

He also can clearly say NO!  This is a bit harder to hear because it is often in relation to a situation where I don’t know what he is trying to communicate or when he can’t explain what is going on.

“Do you want cereal for breakfast?” No! “Toast” Nooo!  Oatmeal?  Noooooooo! NO! NOOOOO!  At this point he is frantically signing, something, and pointing, somewhere, and I can’t figure it out.

These moments break my heart.  Into two million pieces.

But usually within a few moments he gives me a little grin and suddenly all is right with the world again.  Angel on earth.

He currently receives speech, physical and occupational therapy.  He is also attending Raintree Montessori and absolutely loves it.  School has been a Godsend in so many ways.  Having him around his peers has given him so much more confidence.  He is trying new things and playing with new friends.  His teacher, Ann, is the most incredible woman on the planet.  He only has a handful of words…and one of them is Ann!  You mention her name and his entire face lights up.  Many moms would be jealous of the special bond they have…but to me it means the world.  He truly loves his Ann and she loves him right back.

The doctors…well, what do I say?  We still see a lot of them.  We still don’t have any real answers.  I think that I need a full blog post about the medical side.  And I will do that tomorrow.

Scout is still Truman’s best friend and she thinks he is perfect.  I love watching them together.  She is like a mother hen and he just adores her.  Their relationship is so special.  There have been many times that I have worried about how Scout will react to Truman’s special needs…but she always proves me wrong.  There is no jealousy about the attention.  She has a lot of fears and I try to keep her in the loop so that she feels in control…but there are things that I don’t tell her. 

She is doing so much and keeping so busy.  Playing piano, 4-H and now is dancing with a competitive dance troupe.  Many stories there…again, soon.

We have had some health stuff with her lately.  I have mostly not spoken to anyone about it because it seems like too much.  Two kids with health problems?  What is wrong with that mother??  We are trying to find out if it is something big or just something weird…another blog post here as well. 

So…here we go again!  I doubt anyone is paying attention anymore after such a long absence.  But it really doesn’t matter.  This blog was created as a release for me and my crazy thoughts.  If you are reading this…hold on…it is going to be bumpy ride!


  1. I'm still here! So glad you are back!

  2. I really enjoy reading your blog and I have missed your updates. I miss you so very much and I enjoyed feeling a little closer to you by hearing about your life via the blog. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that people read your blog and sincerely enjoy it. I miss ya and I love ya! Kari

  3. I'm still reading. Love you, friend.

  4. Still here and always will be. Multiple kids with health issues - you have a cohort, my friend. Let's get together. Love and prayers, Steph

  5. Still with you, as well... I was from the beginning, but I don't think I've spoken up. Hi, and glad you are back.


  6. I am still reading too! I think you do an awesome job and I loved meeting your family last weekend! =)